Author Archives: Patrick Santino

2021 TDF Stage 4: Eucatastrophe at the Tour de France

“Our hopes were dashed. And yet, within 10 seconds, before the brutal realism of cycling—which functions as a microcosm of human reality—painted upon us the grayest of bleak gray worldviews imaginable…a kaleidoscope of vibrant color and hope jarringly shattered that drab premature assumption of “reality” better than any Hollywood movie script ever could! My beloved J.R.R. Tolkien would call this a moment of eucatastrophe.”

2021 TDF Stage 3: Battle Scars

“Ah! Ah! It is so cruel to see how brutal this sport can be. A whole season built around this race, and within an instant it ends in complete sorrow. Yes, yes, I think this would be the appropriate time to utter the cliché for the one and only time this Tour: Today was not a day you could win the Tour, but you sure could lose it.”

2021 TDF Stage 2: The Renaissance Madman on the Mur-de-Bretagne

“Yes, yes, with all the Bonus Seconds available on both the passages of this Mur-de-Bretagne, the nudge theory went off with out a hitch. And who was bold enough to kick things off from long range? Why, of course, the Madman who always loves to kick things off from long range.”

2021 TDF Stage 1: The Musketeer in Yellow Once More

“Julian Alaphilippe the Musketeer, one of the top showmen of the sport among this great generation of audacious and theatric racers, was on the attack at the Tour de France in a quest for the Yellow Jersey once more. For much of the season the Mighty Aces have bested him in finishes such as these, but here today at the greatest race in all the world, on home soil, in the World Champion’s Jersey, even the Mighty Aces hadn’t a prayer to stop the Mighty Musketeer Julian Alaphilippe.”

2021 Suisse, Papal Visits, and Other Matters

And thus my procrastinating has paid off, because I now get to conclude with musings on the Grenadier and out-rider of chainsaws Egan Bernal’s Wednesday day-out wearing fine street clothes.